The lunches of Orkney fare at the Peedie Kirk are among the highlights of the Festival each year, with the One O’Clock Toast to a notable Orcadian. For this year Harvey Johnston went back two centuries to a lady in Stromness who was visited by Sir Walter Scott. She lived on Brinkies Brae and sold winds to sailors.
…
Like an eagle in her eyrie
On the crest o’ Brinkies Brae
Bright eyes scanned her dominions
In her Bessie Millie way.
…
Fae her less than des res hovel
She’d see all ships come and go
Whether they cam in by Hoysoond
Or sailed right up through the Flow.
…
She cooldna write or read a word
She’d never thowt tae try
But read that open page above
Her textbook wis the sky.
…
The stars, the lunar cycles too
Each slight celestial sign
She kent as weel as Patrick Moore
Or Rousay’s Vetterlein.
…
Cumulostratus, Nimbus, these
Were words she’d never kent
But recognised their shape and form
And kent fine what they meant.
…
A wisp o’ ware fae Warbeth on
Her wall wid let her know.
Of the imminent arrival
Of a deep Atlantic low.
…
Wi’ that barometric knowledge
She could prophesy sincere
That a fairly stiff Soothwester
Wid be likely tae appear.
…
So winds on cue she’d “summon”
And they’d blow their very best
Than as the pressure rises
Hid wid ease aff tae the West.
…
So when bold Captains cam tae her
Tae speer what winds wid blow
She wid stert tae boil the kettle
And pit on a bit o’ show.
…
She wid mutter incantations
And some prayers too wid say
She’d tell him than what winds wid blow
And send him on his way
…
And when his ship departed
She wid watch from high and laugh
The result of her performance?
She wis sixpence better aff.
…
Cheust a very wise owld woman
Who intuitively kent
Whut wis gaan on all aroond her
In her own environment.
…
I applaud her green credentials
And her acumen of course
She wis simply utilisan
A renewable resource.
Her amazing business model
Wis not grasped upon I fear
By the citizens o’ Stromness
For weel on two hunder year.
…
Noo she’s been the inspiration
For new firms near her abode
Set up by Gareth Davies and
Of course by Neil Kermode.
…
Her’s was not by evil witchcraft
But by Science underpinned
She didna need a turbine tae
Mak money oot o’ wind.
…
For Orcadians of Science
I’d pit her weel up the list
Her skills were all o’ those that mak
A meteorologist.
…
A Georgian Judith Rolston
She depicted at her best
Bit withoot the big black glesses
Never spaek aboot the chest.
…
Her fame hid spread so widely
That she visitation got
Fae that great and famous writer
That became Sir Walter Scott.
…
Bit his depiction o’ her wis
Enough tae mak ye irate
He used her aura tae portray
Witch Norna in “The Pirate”.
…
A plague on you Sir Walter
Hid’s tae yer eternal shame
You stole her just identity
And much maligned her name.
…
What Sir Walter did tae Bessie
Wis the sam thing I wid say
That a mere score o’ years later
Charles Darwin did tae Rae.
…
A pair o’ proud Orcadians
Who did their best in vain
And were sore misrepresented by
The power o’ the pen.
…
Wur minded o’ Sir Walter
By his Edinburgh spire
Bit cheust wan stone on Brinkies Brae
For Bessie wid be higher.
…
So let us noo raise glesses
Tae her scientific wiles
A toast tae Bessie Millie
Wur Aeolus of the Isles.
…
